Hurt



One thing about living life, if you lived long enough chances are, that you will have had your share of good times and your share of bad times. That's the way life is and it will always have ups or downs. I was trying to make this point with my youngest son, explaining to him that sometimes life can be hard, but if he just took the time to learn from each experience, then life can become easier to bare. I laugh when I think about our conversation, because for some reason he thought that when he got out on his own that life would be easy or without problems. But what he has found out that life can sometimes be very difficult and most people are not as forgiving as his father. Also he has found out that when it comes to relationships, especially those personal ones they can sometimes become very heartbreaking. He came to me one day hurt because the young lady that he fell in love with broke his heart. He was torn up, because he never thought that it could happen to him, even though he has experienced this first hand.Witnessing his own father being hurt by someone he loved and cherished. We both had very similar experiences, the only difference is that when it happen to me it wasn't my first love or my first time being lied to, cheated on or deceived. I handled being hurt in a different way because I have been through it before and as funny as this may sound, I expected it to happen, so I was better prepared for it than my youngest son was.

Now I know if you happen to be reading this , you may be dying to know what happen or why was my son so hurt by his first love. My son has been seeing this young lady for over six months and made the big mistake by allowing this young lady to move in with him. I remember when he first brought her over to my house, how proud he was when he first introduced her to me. He said, Dad this is my girl Marquita, the one I have been telling you about.(smiling at me like, look Dad I told you she was the bomb) From looking at the young lady I could tell that she took very good care of herself, but was a little to advance for my son. Why? Well for one thing her demeanor was different and she wasn't nervous at all meeting me. I remember when I first visited my ex-girl friends parents how nervous I was because I wanted to make a good impression. Also the way she dressed to me was not becoming of a young lady her age, even though I know times are different and young ladies dress code is not like those of the past. I wouldn't have thought that she would wear something so short when meeting her sons father for the very first time. After she left my son asked me what did I think about her and I told him to watch himself, because from my experience she was a little to advance or fast for him.

As you know my son ignored my advice, then dated her, fell in love then later let her move in and that's where the problem began. From day one she took advantage of a less seasoned young man, she took his money, stayed out all night and played with his emotions. When he would get off from work, she was never there and always on the go. When he confronted her she would explain that she worked at night and where she worked at needed her to stay over time. But one day he decided to follow her and to his surprise she stopped at a local gas station, then retrieved some clothing from the trunk of her car. After she got dress then she went to her other boyfriends house and stayed there all night. My son stayed camped out in front of the young mans apartment, then called me and then said, Dad I am so hurt! How could she do this to me? I then said son leave away from there, because she isn't worth it and it won't be the last time some young lady breaks your heart. Of course you are hurt, but take this as a lesson learned and the next time you fall for a pretty face, figure or smile get to know her first, before you get hurt or your heart broken again. Write in then express your thoughts or opinions on the subject.
Chuck

Comments

B. Lacy said…
Great job
Anonymous said…
When inexperience meets the experience (game versus no game) you know who will get hurt. We as parents can easily see things that are not good for our children but sometimes it takes them getting hurt to realize their bad decisions and that's hard as a parent to be on the outside looking in. Charles, I know you wouldn't have been surprised if she tried to come on to you. Women really feel that their "assests" can get them what they want but down the road it will affect their lives in a huge way. - Lynette

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